Do you have fierce dreams or do you remember a time when you did? Have you ever felt limitless, like nothing was going to stand in your way?
I remember feeling this way after I left high school and was at university. My dreams were all about how I was going to change the world. By helping people, by working for charities and getting my PhD. I was going to travel and maybe even start my own charity supporting women affected by gender based violence.
There is no denying that I have been blessed, I have never gone hungry and I have always had a bed to sleep in. I have people who support me and I have love in my life. My bills have always gotten paid (eventually) so my question is that enough to be happy? Is that all we need? Once we have those things should we consider ourselves fulfilled? Because let's face it, others have it worse don't they?
Around 5 years ago I had an amazing house, two wonderful children, I didn't need to work, we had a nice car and could afford a holiday once a year. we could eat out when we wanted and I could buy things without checking my bank balance first. I ran my own small business and my husband had 6 months of the year at home with us. My life was everything you would call conventional success but the one thing that was missing was that I was miserable
I told myself that I was lucky as there are so many people who were worse off than I was. That I couldn't have it all and that I should just focus on being grateful rather kicking up a fuss. I got caught up in all the day to day responsibilities of 'adulting'. It felt like stability and security were the most important things. It was time to ditch the dreams and get realistic about what was important. I didn't need dreams of travel or having a career I loved because my life was safe. Boring but safe.
Have you ever looked at your life and realised you went in a different direction than you intended? It is a perfectly adequate life but it doesn't really light you up? You are filling your days with the things you are supposed to be doing rather than the things that excite and inspire you.
If you find yourself off track then the way back to what you really want is to remove the layers of obligations, responsibilities and objects, whatever is in the way of your happiness and those fierce dreams. It is adding something that lights you up to your life. Say yes to your wild dreams and no to convention when it isn't making you happy. Be who you are unapologetically and reach for what excites you.
Do not feel guilty, you are worthy of happiness and the life you dream of. Money and conventional success are great if it excites you. But if it doesn't leave you inspired and enthusiastic about the future then ditch it. You are not ungrateful for wanting something different to what you have. You cannot make yourself happy in a situation that is not what you truly want.[caption id="attachment_1311" align="aligncenter" width="1600"] Photo by Jaime Handley on Unsplash[/caption]
Once your basic needs are met you do not lose the right to complain. A comfortable and stable life is not necessarily the ideal life for everyone. You cannot stop yourself from having wild and adventurous dreams because others are not as fortunate as you are. By all means, do your bit as a responsible citizen, help where you can, support others who need it.
It is fundamental in my opinion that everyone should have the right to be fed, clothed and sheltered. As is health care and education but here I am heading towards a political discussion that distracts from my point. The right to happiness is also important. The right to have dreams and unconventional desires. Dare to dream of an amazing life whether it be a home by the sea, an endless supply of books, or the opportunity to travel. Don't let what makes you who you are be sidelined for anything. Our dreams make us unique and they are far too important to be given up on or forgotten.